John 3:16

I first heard the good news watching Jesus of Nazareth on an old VHS tape that a family friend had left at our home. I was 4 or 5 years old and at the crucifixion tears began rolling down my cheeks. Deeper than the horror of the scene, there was something about what this mysterious man did that moved me deep in my soul. It wasn’t until my mid twenties I crashed to my knees alone in my bedroom, the without-reason-hollowness in my soul so suffocating that all I had left was to cry out to the Lord. He came for me. I’ve heard the good news written on an advertising lorry parked on the side of a motorway, I’ve heard it on toilet cubicle door graffiti, on a comedians audio cd, on the underside of Forever 21’s bags and during times when people make fun of the cross. I sit and watch in quiet amazement how my children eagerly request “the one where Jesus dies” in the storybook bible. I watched how a son delighted in sharing the good news at his dad’s funeral. As a bishop spoke at the royal wedding at the weekend, millions of people heard the good news.

GOD LOVES YOU. The source of love, love himself. Loves YOU. Love so big that no earthly words could ever describe. He is the one you are searching for. He is the missing piece. The refreshing breath. And the best surprise of all is that all along we think we’ve been the ones searching but all along it’s been God pursuing us with powerful galaxy shattering relentless furiosity.

Whether you hear the good news and shuffle uncomfortably in your seats, laugh at the absurdness, roll your eyes, raise your eyebrows, whether you are religious or not religious, on a spiritual journey, whether you have mocked or mock Jesus, whether you are a good upstanding member of society, whether you’ve never done a single thing right in your life. Whether you mumble through the Lord’s prayer on autopilot or have never heard of it. Whether you’ve never set foot in a church or when you do you just want to bash your head against the pew in front because. this. endless. droning. from. the. vicar. is. really. never. going. to. end. Whether you’ve been forced into a religion, escaped one or weren’t brought up in one. Whether you’ve been jaded by oppressive religious authorities or told God doesn’t love you because [insert any number of reasons a human can hatefully control another human]. If God has not measured up to your expectations, if he’s never answered you or you want nothing to do with him. If you’ve openly or secretly hated all the god bothering and bible bashing nonsense you come across. If you don’t know the commandments or if you’ve done or not done some or all of them. If you don’t understand how God let those people get away with the things they did to you or someone else. If you are angry, hurt or strong. The homeless, the hungry, the accomplished, the terminally ill. If you just feel nothing. If you feel it’s too late. If you are filled with lead-heavy guilt and shame. If you are entangled in a web of deceit right now. Whether you are caught up in the occult or dabbled with the demonic. If you are harassed and held hostage by fear, if you can’t find the way out. If you are just plain tired. The adulterers, the losers, the Mr and Ms perfects, the rich, the lost, the lonely, the religious scholars, the confused, the broken, the charitable, the imprisoned, the good souls, the addicted, the famous, the forgotten and ignored. Who ever you are, where ever you are, what ever you are doing right now, whatever you have done or not done YOU ARE LOVED and this is for you, his love can not be earned but it is a free gift to receive.

“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.” John 3:16-17

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Pour

Last weekend I was feeling unusually down and withdrawn. On Sunday night I couldn’t get back to sleep, I was really cross with endless worries whizzing around my head. I starting ranting at God. Where was he? Where had all my joy gone? And then the word “POUR” breathed into my heart. Pour?…Oh, pour out my heart! So I stopped ranting and started pouring out all my problems, the worries, questions, stresses, then I fell asleep.

When I woke in the morning, I felt refreshed and immediately the flashback I had a month or so ago came to mind and I had a lightbulb moment; of course the after effects; feeling down, withdrawn, irritable, anxious, the sleeplessness. The flashback I experienced had been so positive (in comparison to previous), I hadn’t considered the aftereffects. I didn’t even twig two weeks ago when I started writing a blog post called “Trauma Timebombs” and wrote –

“Having a flashback is like an internal bomb going off, the effects ripple out to all areas of life.”

I hadn’t realised I had been experiencing the ripple effects until I poured my heart out to our Wonderful Counselor, our Mighty God, our Prince of Peace.
When we pour out our troubles, He pours in – wisdom, comfort, healing, peace and joy unlimited.
And then I came across Psalm 94:18-19

“When I said, “My foot is slipping,” your unfailing love, LORD, supported me. When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought me joy.”

And then I read about the return of the Ark in 1 Samuel 6 and my heart flipped a million times because right there is the character of God; always providing, fulfilling every promise, never leaving us, never failing us, preparing the way before us, giving us rest in the storm, constantly working for our good even when we are not aware of it, leading us safely through the fire, scooping us up every time we fall, fighting our giants for us, surprising us with the most wonderful gifts, turning devastation to dancing, brokenness to joy, sorrow to songs of thanksgiving. He has poured heaven into our hearts.

PTSD has caused so much destruction and aguish in my life but it is a bomb that has been defused by the greatest love I have ever known. It is rendered powerless to the Name that is above all names. Jesus Christ is Lord.

Ask

If you have wondered about Jesus over Christmas but have only seen him as a plastic doll or a distant figure in a stained glass window or maybe Jesus hasn’t featured in your celebrations at all. But if you have felt a pull in your heart to know Jesus, then where ever you are now, all you need to do is ask him. God loves you SO much. There is no greater love than this. He has made a way for you. There is absolutely nothing you can do or have done to make him love you any more or any less than he already does.